Acting For The Result You Want

It’s not rocket science that there are things you do in your business that are essential to creating the results you want.

Except what often times ends up happening is you experience a disconnect, especially in the beginning, because you are doing things that are outside of what you’re comfortable doing.

And, the discomfort can bring up a lot of thoughts.

Thoughts that not only generate feelings of doubt, frustration, confusion, insecurity, inadequacy, and insufficiency, but that also make you question your own identity.

One of the thoughts that’s really good at this is “I’m not the kind of person who does this stuff”.

(Stuff being the things you do in your business.)

So, you take certain actions, except deep in your soul you think “I'm not the kind of person who does this stuff”.

Because if you were, you would feel excited and compelled to take action.

It would feel effortless!

And, since you don't feel that way, this naturally reaffirms the thought that you're “not the kind of person who does that stuff”.

And, since you're not the kind of person that takes that kind of action, then you're certainly not the kind of person that gets the results you deeply desire, either.

The Loop

Herein lies a loop I see many solopreneurs run tireless circles in:

1. They know they need to do the things.

2. They get into their head about doing the things.

3. They talk themselves out of doing the things.

4. Except… they know they need to do the things.

5. They do the things, but without proper support.

(Rinse and repeat after whatever step you make it up to.)

Most people make it to the 4th step before they rinse and repeat.

Some make it to the 5th, rinsing and repeating from there.

Regardless of where you find yourself, you’re caught in this loop.

A loop that keeps you from signing clients and creating revenue in your business.

Not because you’re at fault or incapable of doing the things, but because you innocently don’t know you’re caught in the loop to begin with.

Being in the loop is not the problem.

The problem is that many solopreneurs haven’t yet developed the skill to move out of the loop.

Imagine having that skill.

What would change in your business and life?

What would happen if you got really efficient at moving out of the loop?

With the skill, it wouldn’t matter how many times you find yourself in the loop because you could skillfully navigate yourself right through it each time once you notice it happening!

When I was stuck in the “niche” loop, this skill allowed me to move through it.

And, while I still get stuck in different loops as my business grows, I’m stuck in deeper stages of my business because I’ve been able to move through the loops in stages prior.

Big Loop Energy

What most people don’t realize is that the loop holds its own kind of energy.

And, when you’re caught in the loop, this energy leaks into the actions you take while in it, Step 5.

For example, when you’re thinking that you’re “not the kind of person who does that stuff”, then you likely feel an emotion that’s lower in energy.

There’s nothing wrong with taking action with this energy, but the results might not be what you’re looking for.

You might notice that when you do tell people about your business and what you do from this energetic space, you might be doing it because you’re “supposed to”.

And, when you’re “supposed to” do something, the intention then comes from a place of obligation instead of a genuine willingness to be of help creating a disconnect in your interactions.

So, when you go to a networking event or you’re out and about and share what you do for the sake that you’re “supposed to”, it doesn’t land.

You sense them pulling away.

You sense the death of the conversation.

You sense the rejection, embarrassment, and withdrawal as it unfolds in real time.

It’s why you might say “this is not who I am” and feel disingenuous in the connections you’re wanting to make.

It’s why you feel resistant to do the things that your business needs because you don’t want to come across as “salesy” or “overbearing”.

This is where the loop goes into rinse and repeat.

Moving Out Of The Loop

When it comes to moving out of the loop, it’s important to explore beyond what surfaces.

As you explore deeper into why you feel disingenuous, you might come to find it’s because you’re concerned about the experience you’re creating with people you interact with.

It might remind you of an incident when you felt unimportant in a conversation because the other person was so focused on their own agenda they weren’t paying any attention to how it was making you feel.

So, it's incredibly important you to share what you do in a way that feels authentic to you AND respectful to them.

You want people to feel safe. To feel seen. To be heard.

What a beautiful thing to be concerned about!

And, when you see that feeling disingenuous really comes from a place of concern for others and respect for yourself, you get to offer yourself compassion knowing that your heart in the right place.

You get to comfort and soothe yourself because the concern is valid AND incredibly thoughtful.

And, you get to solve for it now that you know what was underneath.

Acting For The Results You Want

Knowing that the results you want are to be respectful and create an amazing experience with others while being able to authentically and genuinely sharing what you do, you get to decide how you want to show up to those interactions with these important questions:

• How will you act to ensure you’re being respectful of others while honoring yourself?

• What things will you do or not do to guarantee those results?

• How do you want to feel while you’re doing those things?

• What would you need to think in order to feel that way?

So, instead of taking action from the thought you’re “supposed to” and feeling obligated, you can now act for the result you want because you’ve figured out how to support your actions with thoughts and feelings that are aligned.

Rinse and repeat.

Boldly,

Lynne xo