It Gets To Be Whatever You Want It To Be

Welcome to the first TBC Bold Letter.

Thank you for being here. 🫶🏽

To be honest, I wasn’t really sure how I wanted to kick off these letters.

“Should I talk about business?”

“Should I share about myself?”

“Should I just write what I’m feeling in the moment?”

“Should I… XYZ?”

As my brain did the frantic song and dance around what I thought this letter needed to be, I eventually came to the point where the future version of me (who has this all figured out, btw) stepped in and said, “it gets to be whatever you want it to be”!

And, not in an annoyed, hurried, dismissive way, but in a genuine, encouraging, and loving way.

I mean, she’s not wrong. It does get to be whatever I want it to be!

So, I received her wisdom and next wanted to understand why I was so caught up on what I was supposed to write that I was blocking my ability to write in the first place.

As I really thought about it, I realized it was because of two things I was thinking:

1. I want to make a sure what I’m writing is of value.

2. There’s a right way of doing this.

I want to make sure what I’m writing is of value.

Right off the bat (and maybe this is my coach’s eye), this desire to make sure my writing is valuable assumes that I believe my writing is invaluable to begin with.

Intellectually, I know this is not true.

Except further evaluation on my thought exposes that I believe a piece of it is true because it was enough to block me from writing at all!

Where does this nonsense even come from?

Once you have a business, you quickly acclimate to the business matrix that says you need to be of (and providing) “value” in order for people to give you any of their time and attention.

This creates pressure in the well-intended business owner to not only second guess their own ability to thrive amongst the masses as they already are, but that there's a magic way (or secret formula) of doing it correctly that needs to be discovered.

This often leads people down the rabbit hole of self-assigned strategies based off of what they see others doing and what they perceive is the “best method” to grow their business.

I truly believe most people have a well-meaning heart when they decide to join the marketplace to serve others by offering their own products/services.

They want to help!

Sheesh, I want to help!

So, it makes sense that you’d want to maximize your contribution to the public whenever you put something out there.

It’s perfectly normal and healthy to experience this.

Where things shift and you can find yourself easily derailed, unfocused, confused, and sitting in overcomplication is when you think the value of your content is in the hands of your audience, the cleverness of your reel, the color scheme of your graphics, the length of your blog post, or the amount of tips you shared on your latest podcast episode.

The real value is you and who you’re being when you create content.

Every. Single. Time.

It’s why future version me said, “it gets to be whatever you want it to be”!

Because whatever I create IS valuable when I’m creating from an honest space within my body that deeply believes in my own value.

I was worried about what I would write when it never mattered in the first place.

What will always matter is who I am being first.

What will always matter is who you are being first.

There’s a right way of doing this.

I don’t think any of us want to get anything wrong in our business, if we can help it.

There’s a sizable amount of time, money, and personal well-being on the line so it makes sense that anyone would want to maximize each and every opportunity by doing the right thing!

Except when you are subconsciously under the trance of “the right way” and chasing this elusive “right thing” in the moment, it leaves you cornered in perfection, paralysis, overwhelm, and confusion.

And, nothing can be created while in those energetic spaces.

So, I wondered, “what am I wanting to avoid if I get it “right”?”

This is always an interesting thought-provoking question to ask because it forces you to view the situation from a stance of avoidance.

And, my answer was just as interesting: If I write the “right” thing, I avoid having to deal with the loss of someone I could have potentially helped.

What’s fascinating to me is that it assumes loss can only happen by me writing the “wrong” thing when loss is just as possible by writing the “right” thing.

Plus, I don’t get to decide if it’s right or wrong.

You, the reader, ultimately decides if these words resonate or not.

And, regardless if they do or not, it’s none of my business!

My only job is to stand behind and have my back on what I’m writing.

And, I absolutely do because everything I write is “right” with me.

That’s what matters.

I share all this because being in business feels dysregulating.

The experience brings up a lot of uncertainty and uncertainty is very uncomfortable.

But, I know you’ve survived your hardest days so far.

You are meant for more and have you a lot to give.

Sit with the lesson are you taking away from this letter and know that as your business coach, I will always walk you to and through.

There will always be something in these letters for you.

Something nudging you closer to where you’re meant to be.

Look for it with intention.

Explore what it means for you.

Apply it like it matters.

Because it does.

It all does.

And, I’m rooting for you the whole way.

Boldly,

Lynne xo